What a Baby is Not

I remember well the curious feeling of my face contorting into an unbidden and  unfamiliar expression when I saw the word "Pregnant" on the home test.  It could best be described as somewhere between the "Oh No, Mr. Bill!" expression and the perpetual smirk worn by the Geiko gecko. 
  Before I could completely get my mind wrapped around the implications of those 8 little letters, my smaller-than-average brain reminded me that I have a history of nurturing.  I have raised puppies, kittens, a smattering of hampsters, a few calves, a very handsome iguana, sea monkeys ordered from the back page of a comic book (they are disappointingly only brine shrimp and do not wear crowns like the pictures), and a Chia pet.  Then I remembered that I killed the Chia pet.  And I don't quite recall the fate of the sea monkeys.  OMG....I'm going to have a human baby!!!!   Good luck with that.

Flash forward 10+ months.  It happened and she is faring better than any of my hampsters.  I'm a bona fide mom, my baby is thriving and I have not forgotten her at the supermarket, put her in the oven and diapered the chicken, or put her on the roof of the car and driven away.  Just to list a few of my most pressing concerns.  Not to say that I haven't made a few mistakes.  But so far nothing that she will need to report to her therapist.  Those moves will come later. 

So the idea of a couple adopting a puppy to prepare themselves for parenthood....absolutely laughable.  And as for the old home economic project of carting around an egg for a week as if it is your love child....the idea of fools.  Nothing prepares one for parenthood except jumping in with both feet and becoming a parent: complete with the anxiety, insomnia, and joy.  Now enough of this philosophizing; back to work on the habitrail system for Izzy's room. 

Update:  Izzy is now 11 weeks old and is progressing very well at her adjusted age of 5 weeks.  She can prop herself up when on her tummy and is reaching, and occasionally chucking, items within her reach.  She tries to smile when she thinks that we are especially entertaining; this sometimes results in her spitting up.  She has outgrown all of her preemie clothes and is now wearing newborn clothes.  After all, at almost 8 lbs, she is finally newborn size!   The next milestones for her will be real social smiling and holding her head up with more control during 'tummy time'.  She's progressing quickly enough that she is thinking of applying to college soon...you know how competitive schools are becoming!